Happiness

https://soundcloud.com/lane8music/lane-8-atlas

Start at (0:30)

I truly have been so uninspired to write anything

I think it's just one of those times where you write to feel something, anything

They’re loud, very loud

They laugh about things I can’t seem to understand

They’re all so close, they’re family

They’re my family, but I feel no belonging

My mind is my only comfort zone

I admire happiness

I'm not a sad person, but my happiness is just temporary

I asked a very close friend of mine what this music reminded him of

I asked him in particular knowing that his understanding of music is very close to minث

I feel like we’re both capable of connecting to notes and beats on a spiritual level

It’s crazy ...

“It makes me feel nostalgic” he said

“It takes me to a specific memory, I know what it is”

“I feel content, free, serene”

I know you do…

This track makes me feel like I’m part of something bigger

Something, somewhere I can find belonging in

A place that will admire the productions of the deepest parts of my brain perhaps

This track does make me feel nostalgic

It reminds me of an imaginary memory where I took a trip with my friends to Neverland, and had nothing of my mind

Memories that my friends share with each other- for real

I know it’s imaginary not because of the destination we were heading at; Neverland

But because my mind is constantly pre-occupied with alot

My mind is always dense & heavy

I’m always worried

I can never seem to point my fingers at the pain and tell my mother

Here mom, here’s where it hurts

I really don’t know where it hurts

I don’t know if it even hurts

It’s just numb

A flatline

I previously mentioned that I lack major understanding of how the real world works because I never quite grasped the feel of it

Where’s home...

I live on a land that’s not mine

Surrounded by people who are just different

I am not very good at expressing my beliefs, and the only person I trust to listen is myself

And a couple of people who do agree with me

My friends for instance

The special ones

We all, or both agree that the life we live today makes no sense to us at all

Nothing makes sense

We’re all at a stop

They consider it a stop towards achieving a career they dream of

I consider it a stop on a very long rollercoaster ride

If you haven’t noticed, I’m currently referencing old people

For some apparent reason, they tell you life is a rollercoaster ride to make you feel better about your misery

It’s funny I referenced it, because I don’t agree for shit

To me, life is an ongoing adventure of lessons learned through experience

I don’t want to listen to people lecture me about the bad things In life

I want to know why

How

When

Where

Are they really bad, or is it just what society thinks about it?

Back to the point, life is an ongoing adventure

Rollercoaster rides usually end at a station that is levelled not too high, nor too low

I want my ride to end at a peek

Where people tell me not to look down

Not because of my fear of heights, but because the below is where the battles I’ve fought exist to haunt me again

But i’ll be too high up they can’t reach me

Then I want to look up, where I can easily touch the stars and shift them around

I want my life to end at eternal happiness,

I’m just so sick of the temporary.

my childhood perception of "eternal happiness"